What is Verbal/Emotional Abuse?

Verbal Abuse:

1. How is verbal abuse defined?

2. What does verbal abuse look like on a person?

If you ask one to define physical abuse, you may quickly get several responses such as:

a.    A woman with a black eye

b.    Bruises all over the body

c.    Broken bones

d.    Flinching when an abuser reaches towards them

If asked to define sexual abuse, again we could provide answers:

a.    Vaginal tearing in a child (or adult reporting rape)

b.    Rape victim

c.   Anal penetration of a child (or adult reporting crime)

d.    Sexually transmitted disease (child or an adult reporting abuse)

But, verbal abuse, you can’t see, there are no apparent tale, tale signs. In my first marriage, I tried to get away by going to a local shelter in North Florida. The lady opened the door looked me up and down with my two kids and stated, “Lady, you don’t have any signs of abuse, we have women here with real problems, you can’t stay here.” That was over 20 years ago and though time has progressed, and verbal abuse is at least acknowledged as a form of violence, we still have work to do if we want the next generation to understand the damage caused by the fiercest weapon on our body, the tongue. I was leaving a Local grocery store one afternoon and heard a young man (about 17-19yrs old) call a girl (about 16-17 yrs. old) several names and ended with “B@#^& before I slap you.” Her response, “Boy you so silly,” As she lowered her head, and laughed” Why did she lower her head? Could something in her spirit have shouted CHECKMATE, WE’RE OUT OF HERE, understanding she, a triune being deserved better? Was she ashamed because I heard the way she allowed herself to be spoken too? 

Verbal abuse is constantly putting someone down, causing one to question him or her ability is another form of verbal abuse. I speak of several subtle forms in my book, Recognizing and Conquering Verbal Abuse in the Family

A person suffering from verbal abuse may second-guess all of their decisions, are hard on ones-self, insecure, name calls a lot (especially in children) and people pleasers just to name some symptoms. It is, in my opinion, worst than physical abuse if not as damaging due to the emotional scarring. I’ll pick up next week, Monday, January 25, 2016, as we talk about statistics and church abuse.

I Got You,

Carolyn Denise

Your Approachable, Accessible, Author

www.carolyndenise.com

P.S. If you order from my site, your book is personally autographed. Pick up your copy today!

Recognizing and Conquering Verbal Abuse in the Family